Emotions and Moods .....

Emotions defined
Feelings experienced towards an object, person or event that create a state of readiness
a) emotions demand attention and interrupt our train of thought
b) emotions are directed toward something

Emotions are intense feelings that are directed at someone or something. They are reactions, not a trait.

Moods are feelings that tend to be less intense than emotions and which lack a contextual stimulus. They are not directed at an object.

Emotional labor.
Emotional labor creates dilemmas for people when the situation requires them to exhibit emotions incongruous with their actual feelings. It is a frequent occurrence. For example, when there are people that you have to interact with whom you find it very difficult to be friendly toward. You are forced to feign friendliness.

Felt vs. Displayed Emotions
Felt emotions are an individual’s actual emotions.
Displayed emotions are those that are required and considered appropriate in a given situation. They are learned.

Felt and displayed emotions are often different. Situations often require people to exhibit emotional behaviors that mask their true feelings.

Emotion Dimensions
1) Variety
There are many emotions. Six universal emotions have been identified: anger, fear, sadness, happiness, disgust, and surprise.

Emotions are identified along a continuum from positive to negative. The closer any two emotions are to each other on this continuum, the more people are likely to confuse them.

2) Intensity
People give different responses to identical emotion-provoking stimuli. Sometimes this can be attributed to personality.

People vary in their inherent ability to express intensity—from never showing feelings to displaying extreme happiness or sadness

3) Frequency and duration
Emotional labor that requires high frequency or long duration is more demanding and requires more exertion.

Can People Be Emotionless?
Some people have difficulty in expressing their emotions and understanding the emotions of others. Psychologists call this alexithymia. People who suffer from alexithymia rarely cry and are often seen by others as bland and cold. Their own feelings make them uncomfortable, and they are not able to discriminate among their different emotions.

Emotional intelligence dimensions
Emotional Intelligence (EI) refers to an assortment of non-cognitive skills, capabilities, and competencies that influence a person’s ability to succeed in coping with environmental demands and pressures.

a. Self-awareness. Being aware of what you are feeling.
b. Self-management. The ability to manage one’s own emotions and impulses.
c. Self-motivation. The ability to persist in the face of setbacks and failures.
d. Empathy. The ability to sense how others are feeling.
e. Social skills. The ability to handle the emotions of others

Par ab hadd e ad.ab mai na raha ja.a

Har tanz kiya ja.a , har aik tana diya ja.a
Kuch bhi ho par ab hadd e ad.ab mai na raha ja.a

Tarekh nay qadmo ko diya hai yehi pai.gham
Haq mangna toheen hai , haq che.en liya ja.a

Jon Aelia .....

Non - verbal communication 1 of 2

Non verbal communication
Nonverbal communication consists of that part of a message that is not encoded in words.

The nonverbal part of the message tends to be less conscious and often reveals the sender’s feelings and preferences more spontaneously and honestly than the verbal part.

If the verbal message does not match the nonverbal communication, people tend to Believe the nonverbal message.

Four types of nonverbal messages
1. Personal (to the individual)
2. Common to a group of people or culture
3. Universal (to humankind)
4. Unrelated to the message (random)

Personal Nonverbal communication involves kinds of nonverbal behavior that are unique to one person. The meaning is also unique to the person sending the message.

For example, someone may work while talking; another person may work in silence. One
person may laugh due to nervousness or fear, while another may cry.

Cultural nonverbal communication, by contrast, is characteristics of, or common to, a group of people. It is learned unconsciously by observing others in the society group. In
Aboriginal culture, for example, eye contact is less acceptable than it is in European culture.

Universal nonverbal communication is behavior that is common to humankind. It shows
happiness, sadness or deep-seated feelings – for example, a smile or tears.

Unrelated nonverbal communication, such as a sneeze, is unrelated to the verbal
message. It can distract from the verbal message, but has little effect on the meaning of
the verbal part of the message.

Analyzing Nonverbal Communication
Nonverbal communication always occurs in a context, or framework. The context often determines the meaning of the nonverbal behavior. On different occasions the same nonverbal gesture may have completely different meanings. Without context and spoken works, nonverbal behavior is almost impossible to interpret with any accuracy.

Non - Verbal communication 2 of 2

Seven different aspects of analyzing non verbal communication
Theoretical writings and research classify nonverbal communication into seven Main areas:

1. Body movement (kinesics behavior)
2. Physical characteristics
3. Touching behavior
4. Vocal qualities (paralanguage)
5. Space (proximity)
6. Artifacts
7. Environment

Body Movement
Body movement, or kinesics behaviour, includes movement of the hands, head, feet and legs, posture, eye movements and facial expressions – all these affect the message.

Body posture – the way a person stands, leans forward, pointing and shaking a Finger at someone, is seen as trying to dominate the other person. The way this is received by others, and the type of feedback given, determines how the Communication will flow.

Physical Characteristics
Physical characteristics such as body shape, general attractiveness, body and breathe odors, weight, hair and skin color are important parts of nonverbal communication.

Because people react and respond to these factors, they all determine their responses in interpersonal encounters. First impressions and images of others can be associated unconsciously with past experiences of people with similar physical characteristics.

Paralanguage (Vocal Qualities)
It consists of the voice qualities and vocalizations that affect how something is said rather than what is said. Voice qualities include:
Pitch range
Pitch control
Rhythm control
Tempo
Articulation control
Resonance.

Paralanguage (Vocal Qualities)
Vocalizations also give clue to the total message. The tones of voice, rate of speaking and voice inflection are an important part of the total message. A tired person, for example, will speak more slowly than usual, a disappointed person may speak with a flat tone, while the tone of voice of someone excited about a coming holiday reflects this excitement.

Vocal characterizers: Laughing, crying, sighing, yawning, clearing the throat, groaning, yelling, whispering
Vocal Qualifiers: Intensity (loud/soft); pitch height (high/low).
Vocal Segregates: Sounds such a ‘uh-huh’, ‘um’, ‘uh’; silent pauses.

Proximity (Use of Space)
Proximity means nearness, in terms of physical space. How people use their personal space and that of others communicates a message. This response to spatial relationships in formal, informal and intimate setting indicates how that person perceives and feels in that space.

People also use their height and weight to convey a message. If you tower over other people in a way that intrudes on their personal space you may cause their discomfort and withdrawal.
Personal space varies according to: Gender, Status, Roles, Culture

Research has shown that Australians speaking to acquaintances or work colleagues leave about an arm’s length of space between themselves and the other person. People speaking to friends and family leave about half an arm or an elbow’s length between themselves and others.

People in intimate relationships allow direct and close contact when speaking to each other. The use of space reflects the way people feel about others.

Artifacts
Artifacts are objects used to convey nonverbal messages about self-concept, image, mood, feeling or style.

For example, perfume, clothes, lipstick, glasses and hairpieces project the style or mood of the wearer. Many artifacts are common to the group but we also use artifacts, particularly clothing, as an individual form of communication.

Appearance and cloth are important and highly visible parts of nonverbal communication. Consider the different between the clothes you wear to the beach and the clothes you wear to a job interview.

The choice of clothes reflects your mood and your attitude to the occasion. Other people note and place their own interpretation on your dress.

Even if you decide you will not bother about personal appearance or clothes, others will read this message as part of your nonverbal communication.

Environmental Factors
The environment can influence the outcome of communication. The environment should put people at ease and match their expectations; an unsuitable environment can produce ‘noise’ that causes communication barriers and interferes with the communication process.

Certain instincts, such as desire for privacy, familiarity and security, need to be satisfied. Natural and artificial light, color, temperature, tables, chairs, desks, lounges, plants, sound, artwork, magazines, and floor and wall coverings all have an impact on people’s perception of a place

Attention to punctuality or a disregard for it can make a strong nonverbal impact. A disregard for punctuality may, like a sloppy appearance, merely reflect a casual attitude. However, a deliberate decision to keep a contact waiting may be a way to communicate a negative message.

While punctuality is a matter of courtesy, attitudes towards its important vary between cultures. To be kept waiting for a business appointment on a tropical island will not have the same significance as a delay in some European counties where punctuality is highly regard.

The above discussion of the seven aspects of nonverbal communication provides a theoretical analysis. However, to consider each aspect in isolation is artificial. In practice, what is sent as a total message is a cluster of nonverbal cues in association with the spoken words